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Downsizing: Downs, as well as ups

First, a word on where I stand in the downsizing process: I am still tackling the easy stuff - the things that are stored in the house that don't get much use. I have been going room by room, and have made one complete sweep of the house, which has netted something like 16 trips to Goodwill and two pickups here at the house, one by Big Brothers, Big Sisters and the other by Purple Heart Veterans.

My friends, I still have a very long way to go. Which is okay, because I have the luxury of a somewhat flexible time table. For starters, I'm not planning on listing the house for sale until early in 2014, so there are months to go.

Still, there are times, like yesterday, when I find myself completely overwhelmed. For one thing, I cannot figure out what, exactly, is going to move into my sweetheart's house, and what is going to storage or being passed along. For another, I cannot yet see/feel myself actually being comfortable working in my sweetheart's house. There's not a space there (yet) that is mine, nor one that appeals to me the way my dining room here, full of light and pretty things, does.

And then I start thinking about how VERY much there is to do here, and it gets totally overwhelming. At which point, I have a meltdown (my beloved is so very good at nursing me through, by the way) and start to think it might be easier to just forget taking anything there, and just pitch absolutely everything. Which is, of course, ridiculous in so very many ways. And of course things will work out. They truly will.

It's at this point that I realize that I need to do these two things:

1. Take a step back. And take a few deep breaths, too. It doesn't all have to be done at once. Thankfully. This is true whether your deadline is, say, February of next year or the end of August.

There is time to take a step back, and to STOP for a bit, and focus on something else. Food, maybe. Or a good night's sleep. Both of which are excellent tonics.

I know there are others who are downsizing (for themselves or for a loved one), who do not have the luxury of time, as I do, and I can only say that my thoughts and sympathy are with you - so many decisions, so quickly made, must be wigging you the heck out. But it's truly okay to walk away for a little bit to allow yourself to recharge. Maybe go to dinner. Maybe go to a movie. (I loved RED 2, which is a delightful bit of escapism.) If you choose to go to a movie, I'd really recommend something funny (like the aforementioned movie) over something thought-provoking or deep, because you, my friends, are already spending too much time with depth and provoked thoughts.

And then, when you return to the process, blare some happy tunes to help you sail through the first part of your mission. (Even happy tunes only sustain you so much.) And remember to hydrate.

2. Take a few minutes to formulate a new plan. I'm not talking a "from scratch" plan, just recommending that you take a few minutes to pick the next few things you plan on tackling. And then break them down into a manageable form.

Maybe, like me, you were working on "clean the right side of the basement". Only you are now quite literally weeks into the right side of the basement, and you are starting to think it may never get done. Because your list actually should have included going through four file boxes full of photographs and scrapbook materials (mostly documents/tickets/flyers/programs that need to go into scrapbooks, if you're still even making them, which you aren't so sure of), plus bags and stacks and piles and stashes of actual scrapbooking supplies (stickers, buttons, string, ribbons, gewgaws, doodads, doohickies, and more). To say nothing of the paper. Piles and stacks and pounds and pounds of paper.

I have found that working at it for a minimum of 20 minutes a day has been helping. And, as I said back in May, the only way out is through. Also, reassessing so that I know that "clean the right side of the basement" involves "go through photos", "go through scrapbook supplies", "go through quilting supplies", "go through other miscellaneous craft supplies", etc. - it is helpful, as the weeks stretch on, to be able to cross some of these things off, even if the overarching goal ("right side of the basement") can't be scratched out yet.

So, yesterday was a down day. But I am going to formulate a new list or two. And today, I'm headed for UP.


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Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
jbknowles
Aug. 6th, 2013 03:01 pm (UTC)
Sending you strength and peace and whatever else you need, Kelly! xoxo
kellyrfineman
Aug. 6th, 2013 07:15 pm (UTC)
Thanks, Jo. I need someone to take some of my stuff off my hands. And to help me figure out where my own space at Morris's house is.
jongibbs
Aug. 7th, 2013 01:33 pm (UTC)
I recommend adding #3: Decide to have fun :)

kellyrfineman
Aug. 7th, 2013 02:05 pm (UTC)
That's a solid recommendation. Because really, if you decide to have fun, you almost always DO!
soulfully
Aug. 7th, 2013 09:35 pm (UTC)
*hugs* It will all work out in the end! And who says you can't turn your new dining room into a great writing place?! =)
kellyrfineman
Aug. 8th, 2013 04:27 pm (UTC)
The new dining room's table is too high to work at. Also, no view of anything at all. But yes, I'm sure something will work out. Eventually.
soulfully
Aug. 8th, 2013 05:57 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry to hear that. I do hope you are able to find you a place soon.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )

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