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Quiet Wednesday

Today was a quiet sort of day. I finished cutting out the pieces of a new quilt. I did a load of laundry. I made it to the bank to get my allowance. I had a lovely nap with my sweetheart (which was good - I woke up tired and was looking forward to my nap all morning). And then I had a bath this evening, with Epsom salts and an essential oil blend that is supposed to be calming.

I think it worked. I definitely feel calmer. And certainly smell better.

For the foreseeable future, I'm trying hard to keep my daily expectations for myself low. It actually is work for me to scale things back. I suspect this is pretty common among women I know. Things like laundry and grocery shopping and cleaning one's space and cooking and all that stuff is part of the "background noise" of life and barely counts to most of us as an accomplishment.

But it should.

Especially when, if you post that, say, your husband or sweetheart did that stuff, you'd get lots of comments about how wonderful he is for doing it. As if it's not also his clothes, house, stomach, etc. involved. (Yeah - there's sexism involved here, and it is amazing to me how many of us womenfolk perpetuate this particular niche of it.)

Then again, if you were talking to your mother or a girlfriend and she listed those things, you'd give her more credit than you give yourself. I mean, not as much as you would give a DUDE, but still, more than you would give yourself. (Or is it just me? Somehow I doubt it, but hey, if it is just me, let me know.)

Anyhow. I will be giving myself credit for ALL THE THINGS from now on, if only because it's all I can do to accomplish some of this stuff. (And the cleaning has gotten harder, too, since I am losing an awful lot of hair. Thanks, infusion-that-didn't-actually-help-my-RA-but-causes-hairloss-and-hand-fungus!)

I hope you are giving yourself credit for all you do, too.


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Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
TS Davis
Sep. 1st, 2016 04:55 pm (UTC)
Ooooh, snap.
"Yeah - there's sexism involved here, and it is amazing to me how many of us womenfolk perpetuate this particular niche of it."

WHOA.
This whole post is a good old sharp kick in the keister. Thank you.
kellyrfineman
Sep. 2nd, 2016 01:43 am (UTC)
Re: Ooooh, snap.
Well, it occurred to me after a friend in a private online conversation remarked that Morris is amazing for cleaning the bathrooms and using a dry mop on the floors. (I clean the kitchen and dust and do windows when needed - he does that stuff and vacuums. We both like our tasks that way.) And I sort of thought "yes, he is" and then "wait a second - nobody thinks *I'm* amazing if I do any damned cleaning thing. and then I thought about poor Huma Abadin, who is taking crap from various press sources for "leaving her child at home with her husband" while she works at her high-profile, high-salary job. And you KNOW nobody would say boo about things if the shoes there were on other feet, because wimmins are s'posed to stay home. Probably without shoes, now that I think of it. SNARL.

Anyhow, THANK YOU, dear friend, for reading and commenting and "getting" me!
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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